The Ministry of Serendipity at Mornington Crescent runs everything. And that is everything. When the Ministry learns of a spacecraft that crashed four thousand years ago into the Pacific Ocean it sends an elite team of paranormal investigators to recover it. A mad alien thaws out, there is hell and horror all around and thousands flee in terror. Porrig has inherited a planet, or it might be a bookshop, or it might be a gateway into another world. And Porrig is worried, because he has learned a terrible secret. But if he told people, would they listen? No. But perhaps they should, because a mad alien has thawed out, there is hell and horror all around and thousands are fleeing in terror. And there is every likelihood of there being a bloody big explosion at the end. Will Porrig manage to do anything about it at all?